I had to have my Casy girl put down. She was in such bad shape that I had no other choice. She was in pain, and suffering, and that was the part that was tormenting me. The fact that I had to have her euthanized isn't why I cried, it was having to see her suffer at the end.
The decent was rapid. On Tuesday I took her to the vet, had to take her back on Friday, and by Saturday she was gone. I knew she was in pain, and suffering. I was fortunate that my neighbor agreed to take her to the emergency clinic for the shot that would end her life.
I did get some comfort from hearing the test results from the vet. She actually called me while Casey was on her way to be put down. The vet told me that the results showed acute kidney failure, muscle mass deterioration, arthritis, and a variety of other things. When I told her that Casey was on her way to put down, she said she wasn't surprised. It reinformed my idea that it was time to put the poor baby out of her pain.
She'll be back in the house soon. I'm having her cremated and having her ashes put in a box that will sit on the mantel with my other baby, Sophie.
It's been hard, but I know it was right. I miss my bedtime companion. I miss our times together when I would brush her and she would beg for me to keep going. I am sad, but I am coping and trying to be a peace with the fact that she's no longer suffering and in pain.
